On the Attack!

Today I want to speak a little about how we beat ourselves up... why we beat ourselves up and how to stop the cycle.


I would say that the majority of us have done this in one way or another... we do something or don't do something and then beat ourselves up over it.


Examples:

I should have said ....

I shouldn't have said....

I should have done this... or that ...I could have done more...

I could have gone farther...

I forgot this .. or forgot that ....

I could have ..

I should have...

Why didn't I...

Why did I....


blah blah blah ... the possibilities are endless..


Why do we feel so much guilt for things we did or didn't do?


Why then do we torture ourselves with it? Going over and over in our heads .. arguing with ourselves and convincing ourselves that we are less than we should/could be.For some, maybe making ourselves feel bad is so familiar that it feels safe to us.. of course we don't "knowingly" do this ... but we do it.Feeling bad can be so common to us that when there is nothing else to make us feel bad .... we then abuse ourselves in one way or another.. sometimes it is by talking ourselves down... sometimes it is by making decisions that we know are not good for us... and sometimes it is more like a constant arguing with yourself. How do we stop this cycle?


Heck if I know!! I still do it ... for instance:


This past weekend I fell and hurt my hip and knee ... I've recently signed up at the YMCA and am on a mission to rid myself of this excess weight I've been carrying around ... so this week I have gone to the gym .. I have worked out .. but not full force. My thought is that I don;t want to push myself too far and hurt my knee more and then not be able to work out at all... but as soon as I tell myself that is the reason for not going full force.. I feel guilt .. I know I can do more and so I argue with myself over my own answers...lol.. it's madness! I feel bad for not doing more ... even though it truly is a possibility that if I do push myself to go all the way that I could really strain my knee to the point of being out of commission for a while.. so why can't I be happy with what I have done.. why beat myself up for what I haven't done?


Getting myself to the gym and doing what I've been doing this week is far more than what I was doing so why is that not enough? Why do I feel the need to beat myself up over it? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...


I know many of you will relate...


Over the years, I do feel that I am doing better at not beating myself up as I use to.. but it still happens ... I'm guessing the key is to become aware that we are doing this and once it begins.. STOP! Let it go no further. Pat yourself on the back for noticing and for putting an end to the torture to more forward. Once step at a time...


Many Blessings and healing hugs,
Raventalker

Have You Ever?

Today’s post is dedicated to all those who have found themselves in that deep dark hole of depression, loneliness and sorrow. It happens to all of us at some point in time. Life becomes complicated and messy… there are days when we just can’t deal with what life brings us or we just don’t know how to cope. So many reasons that we can find ourselves in this dark place. Life throws at us so much, sometimes it is just too hard for us to take on.

I want everyone who finds themselves in this dark place to know that you are not alone. This happens to us all and the thing I want you to take with you from this post is that … it is never forever… the pain, loneliness, sorrow, depression is temporary and you can overcome it… there will be light again.



Reach out to your friends and family to help you through the difficult times. With much love and understanding I send to you all great big healing {{hugs}} and well wishes.





Have you Ever?



Have you ever found yourself so sad you didn’t want to get out of bed

Crazy thoughts run through your mind, like what if I were dead

You begin to wonder if suddenly I were no longer here

Would anyone notice, would anyone even care

Your world seems so dark and sad

You wonder, why does this feel so bad

It feels like there will never again be light

It’s so hard not to give up and continue to fight

You wonder what’s next and how much can I take

Then you think maybe I’ll close my eyes and never wake

But then you realize this is no way for your life to end

So you pull yourself together and cry to a friend

Letting go of the misery and all the pain

A friend shows you that there will be light once again

You are not alone in this fight

There are others who feel the same, crying in the night

So let tomorrow be the beginning, a fresh start

And let go of what burdens your mind and your heart

Nothing good ever comes from wishing you were dead

So snap out of it and get your ass out of bed!





Many Blessings,
Raventalker

I'm Letting Go

I’m letting go of this pain ..
Hoping it will move on like yesterday’s rain

No longer does it have a place within
No more sadness .. I’m sending it away with the wind

The hurt is far more than I can bare
I’m washing it away like the grey in my hair

Happiness and light are welcome to stay
As for this pain … you can go and stay far far away

Leave me alone I don’t like how you make me feel
It seems harder each time to heal

I’m not your victim.. I’m not your prey
What more is there to say

Hurt and Pain … it’s you I really don’t like!
I don’t care if you leap, run, drive or take flight!

Just go now and take a hike!





Many Blessings,
Raventalker